Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Who Should Be Present At My Birth?

This question was asked of me at my last Childbirth Conversations class. Having spoken briefly about it on my last post, I would like to speak a little more on it and hear what others think.

This question gets into knowing yourself and the type of birth you are desiring to have. Birth is already an intense time just by the nature of giving birth. Whether you are planning a completely natural birth or as many medical interventions as possible you need to be able to relax to the best of your ability. A stressful environment makes it difficult for the cervix to dilate. I'm not 100% sure why this is, but it is true. (Please note their are other things that can effect dilation, this is just one possibility.)

Personally I recommend your husband being there. This is such an amazing time and something that we have the privilege of being able to share with our husbands in our culture. It can be a time of growing closer together, which is a beautiful thing.

When thinking of who else should be there think about these things:

  1. What are your husbands thoughts on someone else being there?
  2. Will your husband be able to give the needed support? (I say this because some guys cannot handle seeing blood or their wives in pain without freaking out.)
  3. How many visitors are allowed to be in the delivery room (if delivering at a hospital or birth center)?
  4. Do you want more people in your room?
  5. What are you expecting of the people at your birth? (This is super important to ask yourself and then make clear to anyone who you invite to your room so that it doesn't add to an already intense situation.)
Whether it's a doula, parent, sibling, child or friend think through it carefully and pray over it. Invite people that you know will respect you and be a support to you.

Who did you have in your room for your birth? How did you decide who would be in your room?

1 comment:

  1. My mother and husband were at all four of my births. My mother is very comforting and medically knowledgeable, so she is the most important person for me to have in the room. I'd prefer not to have my husband there, but he's allowed to be there as long as he stays by my shoulders during the delivery. :) I had a friend in the room during the first delivery, but that decision caused more drama amongst people that were not invited in than it was worth.


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